The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

the good:
the young one asked me out on another date
ive been good at sticking to my eating plan today
got a warning instead of a ticket

the bad:
yet again i cant go with the young one due to the fact that that i have school 2m and i'm scared he'll give up on me
i got pulled over today for running a stop sign tho i swear i didn't run it
i didnt do my full work out today

the ugly:
my stomach isn't flat
my thighs still touch
104.5 pounds


generally im in a good mood today even though i want to eat so bad right now, its taking all of my will power.
i am really excited that the young one is still interested in me, it gives me motivation to become thin so i can keep him interested. because he's younger hes not as big as other guys which means i have to be thinner for him than i would be for other guys. i wont stay with a guy unless i feel tiny in his arms, and its even better is he can fit one arm around my waist. the lh could do that because he's so tall, and i really liked that.
speaking of the lovely hurt i woke up with 21 texts him this morning, they were actually really nice. and just about how he'll always love me even though he tells himself that he needs to get over me and that he hopes i find a bf soon because i deserve to have a really good one and then he can stop feeling terrible about ruining my senior year. he says he wants me to have the best, most fun and happy life i can have esp before everything changes next year. it was really sweet i thought.
life is life if nothing else. i gotta live it one calorie at at time haha jk

stay strong
stay well
youre in my prayers